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Crying off Script in Workplace Can Ruin Women鈥檚 Careers, 69成人 Prof Finds

Men鈥檚 Anger May Gain Them Stature

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Two work colleagues comfort a crying woman
Crying in the workplace can ruin women’s careers. (Getty Images)

As sexual harassment allegations against well-known men in entertainment, media and politics make news, everyday office dynamics are under the microscope. Professor of the Graduate School of Management at the University of California, Davis, has been examining workplace behavior for more than a decade.

In several studies, Elsbach has looked at why women are often criticized for crying at work. This bias that women face and the anger that men in power display are the results of a complex interplay of unspoken social scripts, she said.

Elsbach鈥檚 most recent research is with Beth Bechky of the Stern School of Business at New York University. They outline four stressful situations at work that commonly induce crying: personal issues, response to feedback, daily work stress or heated office meetings.

鈥楾he wrong way to cry鈥

Kimberly Elsbach
Kimberly Elsbach

Some crying can be OK, as long as women stick to the preconceived notions of what others in the workplace, such as supervisors and colleagues, expect from criers, Elsbach found. Women who don鈥檛 follow 鈥渢he script鈥 are perceived as emotional, weak, unprofessional or even manipulative 鈥 negative attributions that often ruin careers.

鈥淔or most women, crying is really not in their control,鈥 Elsbach said. 鈥淲e know that boys are socialized not to cry and don鈥檛 have to think about it when they鈥檙e adults. But most girls aren鈥檛 socialized not to cry.鈥

She said more organizations need to educate managers on this.

Cultural focus on women

Elsbach said there is a much larger cultural challenge in how we perceive men and women differently at work. Rather than crying, men often express strong emotions by raising their voices and pounding on the table.

鈥淪o when you see Harvey Weinstein, who鈥檚 widely known to be a bully, yelling at someone, that behavior may actually give him status,鈥 Elsbach said.

It follows what is expected from men in power.

鈥淭here鈥檚 no reason why it should give men stature,鈥 Elsbach said. 鈥淲e make specific attributions of behaviors because we have learned to over time. And these are so hard to undo. It will take generations and generations to unravel.鈥

Elsbach and Bechky鈥檚 study, 鈥,鈥 was published by the Academy of Management Discoveries.

Media Resources

Kimberly Elsbach, 69成人 Graduate School of Management, 530-752-0910, kdelsbach@ucdavis.edu

Julia Ann Easley, 69成人 News and Media Relations, 530-752-8248, jaeasley@ucdavis.edu

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